Conflict Res.

I really liked classes this week, discussing how couples should approach conflict, and how to communicate effectively.  I have been trying to make sure that the way I communicate with my roommates is in a way that they cannot misunderstand, which is something that we discussed in class.  So much of our communication is based on non-verbal cues, and I was trying hard this week to be aware of the signals I was using, and making sure that the person I was trying to communicate with was understanding my cues.  It was really interesting.  I was also more aware of how others communicated not only with me, but with conversations that I observed as well.

 I remember thinking that a marriage that had absolutely no disagreements was a perfect marriage, but I realized recently that conflicts or arguments are good, and healthy, if approached the correct way.  Growing up I had really poor examples on dealing with conflicts in marriage.  My step-dad would stonewall my mother, and they wouldn't talk, or when they did it was usually pretty heated.  My dad was really loud and would yell and throw things.  It wasn't until recently, with my mom's new husband, that I was able to see good examples on how to communicate, and reach decisions when different views are had.  Sometimes my mom compromises to please my step-dad, and vice versa.  Sometimes they come to a decision where they both feel victorious, it just depends on the argument.  It is nice to see peaceful arguments, however.  I hope that I will be able to communicate effectively with my wife, and I know that starts now, in the dating scene.  If I can't communicate with the girl that I am dating right now, and she can't communicate with me what makes me think that something will change when we get married and real problems arise?  That is poor thinking.  Anyways, it was a good class this week, and I really enjoyed it.  That's all.